Kerry Needham boarded a flight to Greece convinced she had finally found her long-lost son, Ben – the toddler who vanished over 30 years ago. 
This man seemed to be the right age, and childhood photos made him look strikingly similar to the missing tot. Yet what followed would leave both Kerry and the man involved traumatized as their hopes were crushed.
Ben, from Sheffield, was just 21 months old when he disappeared while playing near his grandparents’ farmhouse on the Greek island of Kos in 1991. Despite an extensive search, no trace of him was ever found, and Kerry has been living with the pain of not knowing what happened to her son.
When a man from northern Greece named Alexis came forward, claiming that he could be Ben, Kerry’s heart surged with hope. The resemblance between Alexis and Ben was so striking that Kerry was convinced this was the breakthrough she had been waiting for. In 2015, after a series of photos and communication, Kerry had even asked Alexis to send a toothbrush for DNA testing. She wanted to confirm that this was truly her son.
But when the DNA test came back negative, Kerry was devastated. “We had a connection, it was strange. He felt like he was Ben, and I was certain – but he just wasn’t, and it tore me apart,” Kerry recalled.
Kerry tried to convince herself that the test results were wrong, and that perhaps the samples had been tampered with. She couldn’t accept the heartbreaking truth and even arranged for more blood tests in the hope of getting a different result. Unfortunately, after weeks of waiting, the answer was the same: Alexis was not Ben.
Despite the crushing news, Kerry has stayed in touch with Alexis over social media, and while they are no longer in regular contact, she says she would have been “proud” if he had turned out to be her son. “I would’ve been so proud if he’d have been Ben. He’s just a really lovely man. I’ll hold him close to my heart for the rest of my life,” she said.
However, the trauma of that experience has made Kerry more cautious when it comes to getting her hopes up. “I can’t put myself through that again,” she confessed. “I can’t get close enough and I can’t let my emotions run away with me anymore.”
Still, the search for Ben continues, and new leads periodically emerge. Most recently, Kerry has been contacted by a man from the United States who believes he could be the missing boy. Although Kerry remains skeptical, having seen numerous people come forward over the years, she hasn’t completely ruled it out. She refuses to let herself get carried away, knowing from experience that it often leads to disappointment.
Despite the disappointments, Kerry holds on to the hope that Ben is still alive. “I just need to know what happened to him. I won’t give up,” she said. Kerry’s strength has been unwavering over the years, even as the investigation into Ben’s disappearance has been a long and difficult journey.
In 2015, Kerry had travelled to Greece to follow up a “strong” lead about a potential match, but the man was later ruled out. Since then, the police investigation has continued, with several excavations of the area near the farmhouse where Ben went missing. In 2016, investigators discovered items believed to belong to Ben, but they have never found his remains.
Kerry has consistently rejected the theory that Ben is dead, especially as no physical or forensic evidence has ever been found to support the claim. “In my mind, Ben is a missing person, and I’ll do what I can to find him,” she said.
But the pain of not knowing what happened to her son still haunts her. Kerry said she has learned to manage her emotions and try not to get too attached to any potential leads, knowing how devastating it can be when the truth does not match her hopes. “It’s a painful process for both parties,” she added, referring to the people who come forward thinking they might be Ben.
Despite all the disappointment, Kerry remains hopeful. She is currently waiting for the results of the latest DNA test on the man from the United States. While she tries not to get her hopes up, she admits: “I think please God, let it be him.”
“I’ve been through this process so many times now,” she continued. “I try to stay level-headed and just be there for the person who believes they might be Ben. It’s a difficult position for them, and it’s painful for me when it doesn’t turn out.”
The search for Ben is ongoing, and Kerry is committed to keeping the effort alive. She has recently appealed for donations to help fund the search and keep the investigation moving forward. “Every day without answers is a day of wondering, hoping, and refusing to give up on my boy,” she said.
Kerry’s journey has been a long and emotional one, and she continues to carry the weight of finding her son. “I’m not giving up,” she said. “I just need to know what happened to him.”
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